Jam Manifesto

Have you heard the expression, "You can't bottle happiness"? It's true. I've looked into it.

I have a secret for you, though. A secret formula:

First, you need wake up early one summer morning (anything before 9 is early for us in the summer. Don't be jealous, I've paid my dues.) Then you need to meet your mother-in-law and head off to a farm.

(Look, it's okay if the morning doesn't go perfectly. This formula will work even if you have issues getting out of the house because your dog thinks he is entitled to come along. It will work even if you also stop for gas and end up, in some bizarro-spastic move, spraying yourself with the gasoline nozzle, Zoolander-style, and then needing to rush to the nearest Wal-Mart to grab a new outfit because you are uncomfortably close to spontaneously bursting into fire. Trust me on this one. If you end up in a similar scenario, don't let it deter you.)

You then need to spend a hour or so picking blueberries with your Mother-in-law and your indentured servants...I mean, your children. It's lots of fun, you'll love it! If you want, you can let your Mother-in-law treat you and the serfs, I mean children (sorry, I can't stop myself!) to fresh berry-topped ice cream. This step is not necessary, but I highly recommend it.

Then - listen carefully - you need to go home and put some of those fresh, ripe blueberries into a big pot. Heat it up and throw in an apple (a good source of pectin) for good measure, if you're so inclined, then add some sugar so that you can enjoy the fruit of your labors all winter long. Cook it until it's nice and gooey, until it coats your spoon and runs off of it slowly like molasses. Making jam is easy! Honest! Then you need to ladle that hot, tantalizingly sweet syrup into jars, and boil it like crazy for about ten minutes.

When you're done, you'll know the secret. You can't bottle happiness.....but it is absolutely possible to can it.

There it is. Happiness in a can.

I think my camera lens was smudged, but I was so high on jam that I didn't notice until it was too late. Sorry.

Guess what else?

You can also can sunshine.

Mine was more sunset-y sunshine, because I used brown sugar in the peach jam instead of white. It's not as iridescent, but it's delicious.

I'm all about the taste.

It that doesn't convince you, here are a few more reasons why you need to make jam:
1- Your kids will think you are super-cool
2-Your house will smell amazing all day long
3-Stirring the bubbling pot of goodness really does feel like magic. It's the one scenario in life where it is not only acceptable but fitting to mutter aloud, "Bubble, bubble, toil and trouble..."
4-You will feel like Meg March, Laura Ingalls Wilder, Anne Shirley, Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm, and the Boxcar Children all at once.

And the most important point:
5-It's yummy.