The ugly truth

Christmas-time can be very stressful.  As hard as I try to not make it so, I often find myself here in mid-December, feeling completely overwhelmed.  I know that most other mothers (if they are honest ones) struggle with this as well:  walking the fine line between creating a festive, warm atmosphere without getting bogged down in the enormous amount of work it takes to get there.

For me, it's my own lack of organizational skills that really gets me this time of year.  I want to get out cards, to re-connect to people we've otherwise lost touch with.  I want to send little packages to friends and family.  I want to remember the school bus drivers and cafeteria workers, who help my children every day and get very little recognition.  I want to do fun things, like making gingerbread men or going to see light displays or hosting cookie-parties.  The reality is.....I will probably only accomplish half of the things I plan to do.  We've already been derailed by a stomach flu and  I just realized that while I was busy cleaning out the upstairs, the basement has become completely unlivable.  A last minute party or school event is bound to pop up.  Add into all of this Baby Ruth, who deserves her own category.  She does not like our life to be too busy, she needs downtime built into every day and it's not just for naps;  she needs to spend time just playing with me on the floor, or reading books, or making a game out of eating yogurt.  The other girls are all big enough now to roll with the program (more or less), but Ruth just can't take it if the day is all go-go-go.

So, my basement stinks.  (Literally.)  The tree is not up.  My list of Christmas cookies is already getting pared down.  The kitchen is a mess and the laundry has piled up and I have once again failed to figure out how to get the outdoor plugs to work, so our yard is dark and Scroogish.

I have, however, played peek-a-boo and danced to the musical card Grandma Niccoli sent Abbie for her birthday (which, by the way, was a favorite) and I've sat beside the tub while the my two youngest took a nice long bath.  And I have to remind myself that it doesn't matter how the other mothers judge my Christmas preparedness, whether my gifts are all wrapped (they are not) or my cards are out (I haven't even taken the picture yet.)  I have to remind myself what Ruth is telling me every day:  the criteria I should judge myself by is whether or not I am taking good care of my family, and that has more to do with their peace of mind than with the number of items I've ticked off of a list. 

So here I go into the third week of Advent and my mantra is:  Keep Home Calm, Don't Worry About What Everyone Else is Doing.

Or in other words:  Peace on Earth, Goodwill toward Men.